u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
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