He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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