Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize