He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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