u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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