Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
