Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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