I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
