I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I would ride that face into the sunset
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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