Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
