I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
So vagazzling was a success
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
