So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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