Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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