She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
