Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize