O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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