my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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