i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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