i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
