dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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