id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
