I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
