Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
