kristin has been a bad kristin
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
