i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Everclear isn't food dammit
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize