i may or may not be watching the land before time
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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