Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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