just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Randomize
