How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
