let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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