This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
