What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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