hell yes lets make some ravioli
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Randomize
