I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
