he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
