Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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