No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize