if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
