Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.

(1-859): View more from Kentucky

Thanks for throwing up on me.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.

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(760): View more from California

Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.

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(757): View more from Virginia

i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.

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(425): View more from Washington

He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game

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(914): View more from New York

We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.

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(757): View more from Virginia

She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask

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(903): View more from Texas

He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.

(1-903): View more from Texas

What a gentleman.

(903): View more from Texas

I KNOW, right?!

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