This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
