after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
