I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
