Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
