if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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