talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
