Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
