Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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