Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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