i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
