It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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